我的藏獒开了我的花苞

A high-pitched scream tears out my mouth and I crumple to the ground squirming backwards burrowing myself into the tree behind me clenching my eyes shut as she does a full-tilt run forward only to stop short at the last minute before our bodies collide. My breathing turns tremulous and I struggle to move shock taking over my body to the severe fright she just gave me.

I understand what she is doing, this is a bluff. She is attempting to intimidate me. How do I show her I mean no harm? How do I get myself out of this situation?

She circles me for the second time swaying her head side to side her cubs huddled together in the corner yet this single cub is truly trying to ruin me for it proceeds forward, even more, to rub up against me sniffing my calves with its tiny wet nose. Curiosity will not kill the cat this time but me instead.

"Theia!" The comforting sound of my frantic male beckoning me has me sit up instantly and despairingly seek him. He is here, I knew I was right! Phobos springs over the dense bushes from the side wearing nothing but a tight ripped loincloth skidding to a halt right in front of me his limbs are drawn open to stay on both of his sides shielding me and he is wheezing for breath uncontrollably, sweat coating his flesh whilst his cautious eyes are fixed on her.

"Phob-"

"Not a word from you." He barks furiously and I clench my mouth shut soundlessly gazing down at my lap. I did not consider what would happen if and after I found him, perhaps it would be a happy reunion of lovers I thought but rather I would be punished of course.

The bear stops in her tracks examining both of us, she somehow seems to understand the circumstances. Just like she is defending her cub he is protecting me, they both hold something important to them. Phobos backs up gradually not showing her his back at any point in time, he picks up the cub that clings to me and gently swats its back nudging it to its mother.

"Me mt svou samiku." He murmurs, his voice is so faint and delicate. He avoids eye contact with her and keeps his head low. But I see how he is stealthily getting into a stance as a precaution, if she comes for me he will attack her.

(You can have your female)

She leans down to sniff her cub inspecting for potential injuries checking to see if the little one was harmed in any way. When she finds none she opens her large mouth and tenderly picks up her young by the scruff of her neck. With one last lingering stare at the both of us, she walks away with the rest of the litter happily following her. A sigh of relief passes my lips as I watch them disappear into the darkness, that truly could have gone another way.

Turning towards my male who has his bare back facing me I beam up at him my heart filled with happiness, I finally found him. I can take him home now.

"Get up." He speaks and I sulk to the upsetting sternness in his voice.

"What?"

"I said get up, Theia." There is a slight climb in the sound of his voice charged with anger at me only to rapidly turn around to grasp my right wrist in a crushing grip and yank me up whilst I wince to his savage brutality. He marches forward towards the path I came from dragging me with him and I trip over bark, branches and stems endeavouring to keep up with his brisk pace and large hurried steps.

"Are you trying to get yourself killed again now that you have finally healed?" He questions, despite the calmness of his voice I sense the thundering storm brewing beneath that is yet to be unleashed upon me.

"Phobos you are bleeding," I whisper upsetly regarding his deeply gashed palm that is swathed so poorly. So the blood I smelt...it is his and it appears as though he was hastily trying to mask it like he was worried I would come after him.

"I asked you a question, you answer." Why is he behaving like this with me? Why is he so distant?

"I just came looking for you. I thought there was a chance that you were here and I also detected blood which scared me so I-"

"You intentionally neglected the warnings I gave you about this place just because you smelt blood. Death by a bear sounds marvellous yes?"

"Death by a bear? That sounds absurd Phobos." I giggle with a shake of my head, perhaps I can make a story to tell to the pups about this. A story of my heroic escape from a mama bear.

"Your immaturity I do not wish to handle it anymore. You leave this instant and you do not ever come back here. Do you understand?" He points his forefinger at the exit and I recoil at his austere words. I feel as though I am being reprimanded but also abandoned for the third time.

"Is this what you have to say to me after disappearing just like that for almost two months? After I gambled my life to find you?"

"I never asked you to come for me, Theia. I came here for a reason and if you were mature enough to understand that you would have stayed back and not caused problems for your pack members or me. Your actions today are very similar to the juveniles I train very impulsive and reckless for a Luna." Understanding belatedly makes its home within me, this male has not missed me the way I missed him. He did not yearn for my presence, it is merely a sense of duty a sense of responsibility that he possesses for he did not leave in the name of love. Why must he make me feel so childish and so utterly stupid?

It is not like I did not know the consequences of my actions, I knew what I was getting myself into. But what could I do it is arduous to fight oneself? All my mind and heart could say was I need him. Yet his words instil within me a degree of insecurity that leaves me breathless. Does he not need me as I need him? Can he stay away for a longer period without my presence? Is it just me who is struggling without his heat? No, I do not want that...I do not like that.

My lips quiver and tears are fleet to brim in my eyes, my throat tightens up and my heart aches to my thoughts. This is not what I had expected, I thought he would be happy to receive me. That he would be proud I was brave enough to explore the wilderness by myself so I could get to him. I thought he would know the instant we found each other just how much I love him. But this is a slap to my face, harsh reality is often the scenario for me.

"If you wanted \'maturity\' in your life you should have asked the goddess for a female your age and not someone nine years younger than you. I will leave now and I will not come back this promise I will keep to you. But know this I am not a juvenile anymore, I have needs and because you choose to stay here instead of coming home with me I shall seek to appease them from one of your males." Announcing my last words filled with frustration and rage weeping noiselessly I spin on my heels proceeding towards the exit. Pitiless male.

A turbulent gnarl blares out his chest and he is fast to arrest me in his arms and fiercely slam me against the rough bark of a nearby tree, his arms planted on either of my sides beside my head he cages me leaving me no place to flee.

"Say those words again, Theia." He growls lowly his jaw clenched the unbearable raging heat of his ocean blues scorching my flesh. I have angered him even more. I keep my head down my sight blurry as continuous tears stream down my cheeks. My heart feels heavy. "Look at me when I speak to you." He states firmly clutching my jaw forcing me to meet his questioning eyes.

"I wish to leave." I whimper to his cruel touch.

"Who taught you to speak like that to your male? Have you ever heard me utter such words to you with blatant disrespect?" I keep still crying quietly soft whines leaving my chest but he does not try to comfort me as he usually does. I have offended him too much. "Answer me. Must you disrespect me this way just because you do not like my actions? Then shall I say the same? I shall go and feed on the flesh of other females?"

"S-Stop it, Phobos." I wouldn\'t have come if I had known we would simply quarrel at the end.

"Stop what? I haven\'t even started yet. Perhaps your family would have let you walk away with that but that does not work with me. Do you recognise your mistake or must I punish you right here to make you understand?" I wish to bare my teeth and show him my defiance but the seriousness in his eyes scare me, I am treading on thin ice here.

"I know it."

"Then where is your apology, Theia?"

"I am sorry." I utter and he finally lets me go pushing me once more towards the exit.

"If you dare to disobey me again and come back here I will not punish you but Drakho and Moira instead. It will be a sight you will not like. Am I understood?" His warning has me shiver, Alpha pheromones leak out his pores showing to me his dominance.

"Yes.." As soon as I give out my confirmation Phobos turns on his feet and trudges forward with neither another glance nor another word at me which has my heart throb more.